It was ‘Resilience’ week at Next Gen Radio, and it really lived up to its name. I started the week really excited, but nervous like everybody else. I have intense imposter syndrome and thought that getting the email was a fluke. I thought I tricked everybody into thinking I knew what I was doing.
Like I said, the first day I was nervous but excited. I already had experience in audio editing, interviewing, writing and photography, so my biggest obstacle was not the work, but getting over my insecurity.
I definitely had some struggles during the week. On one day I got sick. I didn’t eat all day, drank five shots of espresso, and went off to do my interview. I get very nervous before doing interviews. So because of a mix of anxiety and low blood sugar, I suddenly got very hot while my subject was reading a poem and I puked into the trash can immediately as he finished.
After that I got a burrito bowl with my new mom, my mentor Anne who, like a rock-star angel, took care of me when I got sick. I was really beating myself up and thought I messed up, but Anne encouraged me a lot. I went back two hours later and got a great interview. My anxiety about interviews disappeared because the worst case scenario already happened and I lived. I don’t think I’ll ever be nervous for an interview again.
The week boosted my confidence and made me go from doubting myself to being confident in my abilities. I always compare myself to others and assumed everybody was just better than me. I was intimidated by people that I perceived as “better” than me. Being in a group of badass women that I perceived as way above me encouraging me, giving me advice, and understanding my concerns was what I needed….being around people that WANT to help you succeed and believe that you can succeed.
In the end I met awesome people and made friends, and I now have a great piece of work that I’m really proud of. I learned a lot and I’m really grateful that I was picked for this experience.